If you’ve ever been curious about the connection between FEELINGS and NEEDS, try this.

QUESTION  #1

Jot down what you’re feeling this moment. Reference anything – relationships, work, fitness, future plans. Whatever is alive for you right now – take a feelings inventory.

Need some prompts?  Here are 16 common emotions, sorted as Negative and Positive.

NEGATIVE

• Angry
• Anxious
• Afraid
• Ashamed
• Disconnected
• Disgusted
• Drained
• Sad

POSITIVE

• Confident
• Connected
• Engaged
• Excited
• Grateful
• Peaceful
• Happy
• Surprized

OK – make your list.

Bet you noted more than one feeling! Here’s my list, right now:

• Frustrated
• Anxious
• Jealous
• Excited
• Hopeful
• Sad
• Intrigued

“So what?”

Here’s the magic.

With Questions 2 and 3 I’ll show you how to use your feelings/emotions to help identify what you need in this moment, even though your conscious mind might be clueless.

QUESTION  #2

Of the feelings you just identified, there’ll be some you’ll want to keep feeling. For me that’s excited, hopeful, intrigued and sad. I don’t mind sad. It motivates me to keep trying to make the world a better place. It’s an old friend.

The other feelings you possibly want to transform or not feel. For me that’s frustrated, anxious & jealous.

Take any one of the feelings you want to transform and ask ~

“What feeling would I prefer to have?”

Take my feeling of “frustrated” as an example.

Q ~ In the face of feeling frustrated, what feeling(s) would I prefer to have?

A ~ Flow, inspiration, audacity, faith, confidence

Nearly done – stay with me here. Soon you’ll be able to connect your feelings and needs in a flash, but I want to slow it down to show you how.

Now we’re ready for ~
QUESTION #3

Ask ~

“Now that I know I’m feeling ____________, and I’ve identified I’d rather be feeling ______________ , what do I need to get me there?”

For me this looks like ~

Now that I know I’m feeling frustrated, and I’ve identified I’d rather be feeling flow, inspiration, audacity, faith & confidence, what do I need to get me there?

Here’s my free-association response ~

I need to live audaciously. I need to do one thing out of my comfort zone each day. I need to take big, fat risks and stop hiding behind needing things to be perfect. I need to be OK with failure. I need to leave frustration because it is keeping me safely stuck!

Huh! My conscious mind did not know this. I was thinking caution, more research, more time, less risk. But apparently my emotional body has a whole other plan!  I’ve moved from feeling vaguely upset and stuck in a project, to a forward momentum action plan. My feelings pointed me toward what I need. OK – now I’m intrigued to see what happens when I work with anxiety and jealousy!

Might this work for you?